


Seems like all I really was doing Was waitin' for you

by Paulie_Mania



Category: The Beatles (Band)
Genre: Angst, Eventual Smut, F/M, M/M, The second chapter is so much better i promise, This is Bad, hi im new, im sorry, its getting better all the time~, jesus so much angst, please give this a shot, slowburn i guess??, sorry - Freeform, sorry for being big time noob, this was written on a kindle fire with bing as the search browser
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-13
Updated: 2020-02-09
Packaged: 2021-04-23 00:41:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22228693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Paulie_Mania/pseuds/Paulie_Mania
Summary: " My Da always told me I had a big heart I just wish that he could have told me my heart was no good for keeping me alive." John had never seen a more beautiful boy in his life. Pretty pale skin, brown shiny hair, gorgeous big kaleidoscope eyes. He wanted to make him his and make him feel safe. He couldn't do that so he settled for this moment."You'll live a long annoyinng life Paulie love, I'll make sure of it."OR John's made a mistake and he'll do everything thing in his power to try to undo it
Relationships: George Harrison & John Lennon & Paul McCartney & Ringo Starr, George Harrison/Paul McCartney, John Lennon/Paul McCartney, Paul McCartney/Ringo Starr
Comments: 14
Kudos: 20





	1. All my little plans and schemes

**Author's Note:**

> {Quick Edit: I finally rewrote this chapter because I didn't like how I fitted with the rest of the chapter (plus is was really bad) so please tell what you think of it!}
> 
> Hi there!! It's Paulie_Mania!! I've never posted anything on Ao3 before so please bear with me I don't know a lot on how to work this thing! This was heavly inspired by the movie 7 Pounds with Will Smith which I highly suggest you watch! Sorry for rambling but I hope you enjoy!

If you were to crack open a walnut you'd find out its not as simple as its played out to be. You usually need a lot of strength, patience, and stubbornness to continue to open the nut. There's also the fact that when you do succeed the nuts broken into pieces from all the pressure.

John compares himself to a walnut though _irnoically_ he hates the taste. He thinks they're too bitter and they get stuck in his teeth. He tries to convince himself that maybe if he tries them in different styles the taste and the texture will grow on him, that he'll adore them and tell everyone he knows that he overcame his hatred. __

_Unironically_, __he feels the same way about himself.

_______________________________________

John knows it needs to get done. That if he doesn't do this he won't be able to sleep then that'll lead to not doing the rest and not being able to live with himself. That's why he chuggs the rest of his water, runs his already sweaty hands through his hair and takes a deep breath.

He's practiced about 5 times before- going over the basics, such as knowing what to say, not stuttering etc. So after the Sixth he stands and picks up the phone and dials. As he waits for the phone to be answered he takes a glance at his office and makes a mental note to clean it afterwards but before he can finish his train of thought, the line picks up and his breath hitches after realizing what he's about to do.

It's takes a bit of negotiating but once he hears the sweet voice of Richard Starkey he lets go.

"I'm telling you son I never seen such disgusting so called food, I mean it's absolute shet" he yells to the phone. He knows he's loud and he knows he's slightly already made Ritchie uncomfortable. That what he said can be taken as a joke but his unnerving happiness says otherwise.

"I'm sorry sir I can happily have a new food up delivered to your home charge free-"

"NO-No that's not necessary- what uh what was your name again? Richard- Richard Starkey?" Hopefully he's said it in a casual tone because he asks but he knows. Richard Starkey. Sometimes goes by Ringo Starr. 22. Single. Loves to drum but can't. At least not like he used to._He knows, but he still asks._

"Yes sir I-I'll just need your first and last name so I can pull your order through" his kind voice slightly shakes with a sense of urgency and John knows. He knows he's close. He hates the fact that he can tell that Ritchie has had these type of people he had to deal with and the fact that He already has a procedure to follow. He hates how instead of feeling remorse for Richard that instead he feels a sense of relive at the fact that he gets to snap at someone. Make them feel the tiniest of pain that he feels. He hates it even more knowing that Ringo doesn't deserve it. Not one bit. Most of all, he hates the fact that no matter how hard he has tried to change after the _accident_ he still feels the same way about making people feel what he's felt. No matter the person or situation__. __

_ _ _ °^°^°^°^°°^°^°^°^^°°°°^°^°^°_ _ _

_ _ _ It was eight thirty, exactly thirty minutes after what they had planned to have dinner. John knows he's late as he's checked his watch about five times. He takes a deep breath before shoving his keys in the lock and opening door normally- there was no point in being quiet now. He sighed as he saw little Julian asleep in his what he always called "fancy clothes" (which was everything expect his superhero shirts and shorts). He gave him a small kiss on the forehead before covering him up in the nearest blanket which just so happened to be the one Mimi had knitted for Julian two weeks precisely after he was born. It was his favorite, not only because it was warm and comfortable but because it smelled like Mimi herself. She might have not been present for his wedding, disapproving of Cynthia and John's gathering but she still loved the little bugger to death. _ _ _

_ _ _ His was trip down memory lane was interrupted when he heard Cynthia clear her throat before kindly whispering "Glad you decided to join your family to at least sleep John" she was taking off her earrings, a clear sign that John learned meant that she was bothered and tired. Beside the clear glare she was throwing at John she looked absolutely stunning. _ _ _

_ _ _ She had worn her little black dress that she had first worn when they went on their first date(which A) reminded him of when he questioned her wearing it on special occasions since they were very well off and could offered hundred of different little black dresses if she pleased, only for her answer to be that it was her lucky dress because she had managed to reel in THE John lennon and B) she wore that for tonight. And he had screwed it up) her black four inch heels that he loved or how he liked to describe them ' those black whacky things that make your feet all pretty' and a necklace that John had gotten her as an engagement present. _ _ _

_ _ _ "No point on sleeping on Stu's couch when I have a perfectly reasonably comfy one here with my name written on it" He knew he was being a dick. He was already mentally preparing for the fight and the yells that were bound to happen. Yet they didn't._ _ _

_ _ _ Instead Cynthia and the warm beautiful kind hearted goddess that she was went over stroked his face while asking" rough day at work Johnny?" And damn her for asking._ _ _

_ _ _ Screw her for being so understanding- for being kind to him in moments like these when he knew he didn't deserve them. Fuck her for caring and loveing him when all he wanted to do tonight was make her feel a bit of what he felt. To hell with her. John looked up at Cynthia with confused eyes. Why? Why? why? why ?why ?why? After all this time... _ _ _

_ _ _ He wanted to get on his knees and ask for forgiveness. To show her that he didn't deserve her. To show her that she deserved the whole world. But he didn't know how to. So he settled for a small kiss on the lips before leaving her behind and going into their bedroom only muttering "M' tired- going to bed" _ _ _

_ _ _ John had loved Cynthia. He always did- he never faked it. But as time went on he realized that he loved her in a different way. And when he tried to tell her that she had a positive pregnancy test in her hand. So he tried to love her and show her the life he could provide for her. But he also tried to make her feel what he felt. He just never meant to take it so far._ _ _

So he tried hard to get rid of that. He knew was going to destroy him In this process. He shook his head as he tried to regain his composure and forget the memories of Cynthia and Julian. He cleared his throat and continued

"J-John, John Lennon- and you know what that's not even the worst part mate I should send the same meat up to you- have you tried the meat?" He asks but he already knows the answer. _He always knows._

"Uh- W-well no sir I um not a big meat eater myself my stomach not allowing it but I hear great just great things about it-"

" Why are you Jewish? A delicate little queer? Is that why you don't eat meat? Richard??" He holds his breath and for a spilt second he hears it. The robotic voice telling the employee that no orders were placed. So he shoots his shot.

"Woah Woah the fuck was that ? Richard what was that voice?"he's so quiet that he can hear Richard's breath hitch. He can only imagine what runs through his head when he meets disgusting people like John.

It takes a moment for Richard to answer the words seeming to not to reach his tongue. What should he do? What should he say? Of course Ringo had his fair share of rude people who couldn't cope about the fact that he was blind and very independent. It seemed to stun them into insensitivity and sometimes even offend them. He didn't understand why so he tried to understand how.

How people thought because when the question why is too hard to answer, one must resort to ask the question, how. He opted to go the professional way he was trained to, which he soon found out was never the way to go with John Lennon.

"I'm sorry I don't have an order placed for John Lennon-"

"Richard are you blind??" He asks and he can hear Ring is smile fall as he responds with a quiet

"Excuse me?" No amount of training had prepared Ringo for such a blunt altercation- especially over the phone. Sure the occasional kid would ask him why he uses a stick to walk but they were children- innocent beings that didn't understand the big confusing-Ness that is this world. So he tried to justify the boldness of Mr lennon like he tried to do with everyone else.

"You're fucking joshing me right now- a _blind_ vegan meat salesmen- __fuckin hilarious..- have you ever had sex before Richard because some how I can't picture a faggot little blind vegan salesman ever satisfying someone" Ringo's uncomfortable smile fell as he quickly learned he wouldn't be able to justify Mr lennon actions as easily.

So he looked for an alternative, maybe John wasn't being rude- he sounded like an alright lad on the phone so maybe this was all a big misunderstanding- a prank! Maybe Rory put him up to this!! He did always like to pull little stunts like hiding his walker, or giving him salt instead of sugar, giving him wrong information to make him feel a little silly, oh! and putting a little sign on his back that said 'kick me I'm blind' oh boy that one was a good one. He always made up for it by saying that it was a just a joke none the less, and that if anyone were to actually do something out of spite He would be the first to step in and try to end it. So maybe it was Rory and his silly prankster ways at again. He cleared his throat as he blinked away the wetness that was forming in his eyes and asked

"Did Rory from the front desk put you to this? Listen sir Im just trying to help you-"

"HELP ME??? Help me? A blind cock sucking virgin vegan queer help me? I'm starting to feel bad for you Ritchie because I get to open my eyes every morning to be surrounded by beauty and you can't see shet. Is that fair to you Ritchie?? Is it? Do you even now what color the ocean-the sky is?? Do you??" There was no stopping John now. He knew what he was doing wrong- horrible but he needed to see. He needed to make sure Ringo was the one. So he pulled a brave facade on as he listened to Ringo's broken plea

"I-it's blue sir" Ringo was crying now but made sure he didn't sound like it-- at least he hoped. He may have no control over his eyes but he was making sure to compensate with his words. John hears his broken smile and can picture those beautiful blue eyes crying. And somehow that fuels his anger more.

"Its blue sir, say what you want to say, you useless sack of shit, say it!!" He screamed so loudly that his veins popped and his voice was left, ringing his head.

"T-thank you for c-calling Liverpool meat-"

"That's not what you want to say you coward you fairy prancing vegan virgin coward say what you fucking mean!!" John's chin was covered in little specks of spit as he went on and on insulting the man. He knew he had broke him. But also knew he had gotten his answer when he heard Ringo reply with

"Goodbye Mister L-Lennon" as his voice fades away John can only hear the rapid beating of his heart,as he lets it _sink in._ The damage he's done. The way he can picture richite sobbing at his desk. The way he ushers people away when they ask if he's alright.__

His hands shake as he clenches his eyes shut and throws his phone across the room to a wall. John brings his hands to his mouth. He wants to _cry._ He wants to because no matter what he knows that Ritchie didn't deserve that. Not in a million years. He wants to cry but he won't allow it. He'd lost that privilege too.__

So to keep him In line he screams his daily reminder

"CYNTHIA L-LENNON, YOKO ONO, J-JULIAN LENNON,OLIVIA TRINIDAD, MAUREEN COX, BRIAN EPSTEIN, J-JANE ASHER." he hiccuped and he remembers. He remembers so well that he manages to get up grab his paperwork and head out the front door.


	2. Lost Like Some Forgotten Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John was about to tell this young(old??) Tosser to fuck off when he recognized the old tune of Raunchy coming from the guitar. He felt as if his troubles had grown wings and flown off into the sun. That's why he got up and sat next to George a smile plastered on his face as he asked 
> 
> "Know any Elvis??"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there!! Thank you so much for the comments they made me extremely happy and motivated:) I've been sick since Sunday night with the flu but that still didn't stop me :0 The first chapter was kind of a test to see how I wanted things to work out so here I've explored a bit more with the length, detail, and dialogue. Tell me what you think!!

Ringo (Richard Starkey if you fancied) Starr had always been a grateful lad from the day he as born. His Mum always referred to him as her little Ray of sunshine. He was always happy, loved being a helpful hand, and always thanked everyone around him for what they did. When he first learned He had appendicitis, and then developed peritonitis,(both words being far too big for the small child to understand )he had a small stage of sadness due to the fact that he couldn't understand why. He ate all his vegetables, he was nice to his parents and friends and always did his chores. 

Due to him contracting the second illness it caused him to stay in the hospital for months. When the doctors realsed him his mother decided to move to a new neighborhood to start fresh. Unfortunately Later on, due to the impoverished neighborhood in which he grew up, he contracted tuberculosis, causing him to miss school and be sent to a sanatorium, where he remained for about two years. In those two years he had learned to become even more grateful for what he had seeing that he met some kids with far worse things such as cancer.

As he finally was blossoming into a young adult he was slowly but surely gaining confidence. After all he had earned it. If you were to ask a seventeen year old Ringo what his best quality was, he'd say his eyes(after his drumming of course) in a heartbeat. Those blue ocean eyes would get any one sucked into them and under his charm. If he were to brag about anything it would be about those two jems. That's why when his vision started to blur more and more and irritation started to increase, he told his mother right away. After the Sixth doctor vist it was confirmed that he was going blind. And at a time like this Ringo found it damn bloody hard to be grateful.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

John had always loved visiting the children at strawberry fields. Ever since he was a low life teen wanting to get away from home, to now. He liked how suburban it looked and how it reminded him of home. No not his home in Blackpool but his home away from "home", Mendip Avenue with his aunt Mimi. Upon recalling the fond memories he also remembered the Times when the Secretary would let him inside the guilt of him always being outside killing her. At first he liked going just to see how shit other children's lives were. It made him feel better in a sort of twisted way to know that others had it worse then him. 

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / /

_ John stumbled drunkenly into the children's home not bothering to say hello to the nice Secretary, Kate who's eyes slanted in concern once she saw John's disheveled appearance. He somehow made his way up the stairs and into bedroom number nine. _

_ He liked visiting the little girl who occupied room number nine. Her parents had died in a horrible fire whilst her grandparents took her out for walnut pie. After learning what had happened to her parents, the old prunes decided she was too much to handle and left her here. She hasn't eaten a walnut since that day._

_ He liked that. _

_ He also liked the fact that her name was Victoria. (what his sister was named before she was put up for adoption.) Sometimes he liked to think that she was his little sister. He liked to pretend that it was his job to act as her big brother. That one day he could take her out of this 'horrible' place to somewhere they could start over. Sometimes he would even tell her so. He remembers how disappointed he was when he sneaked in late one night to check her paperwork. To check the chances of her being a slight hope he could stitch his family back to together. But alas they weren't related. He'd still like to pretend though. He'd spoil her rotten with candies he'd Nick from the store and teddies he'd find in the lost and found. _

_ She'd brought him joy and he hoped he did the same for her. Today was not the case._

_ He scanned the room for her small figure only to see her drawing at a little table. He remembers when she looked back at him with big innocent eyes and a smile that he didn't feel the regular warmth and hope but instead hatred. He hated the fact that she was in peace that she was happy. Why was she allowed to be happy and not him?? Why was she still happy after losing everything? How?? John wanted to know because he couldn't do shit to be happy. So he cussed her out then in there. He yelled at her for being optimistic, for being happy. That she as in a God damn children's home. Her parents were dead and nobody wanted her. That everyone in her life left because she was no good. Spoiled and rotten by the reality she had built for herself. That no matter what she did she would NEVER be happy.(John wouldn't realize that those were all things he thought about himself untill he was leaning over the toilet the next morning with a raging hangover)_

_ He didn't stop until she was sobbing and he was dragged out by the doctor, Kate comforting Victoria. That was last he saw her. It was also the day after he found out his mother died. The people at strawberry fields held no grudge against him once they had learned about what happened. They even tried to convince him to come and visit Victoria again. The news of her being miserable without his visits affected him more than he wanted to admit it. He refused to, saying he didn't want to put her in anymore pain. The real reason was because he was a coward and he didn't want to own up the the pain he had caused nor wanted to inflict pain to himself. Only to be in more pain when he received a call that told him about her suicide. She was only eleven.___

_ _ Things have changed since then. John now tries to take responsibility for his actions and help others. That's what this whole ordeal is about. _ _

_ _ Shaking his head and any thoughts about Victoria he entered the place, smiling as an automatic response. He turned to his right to greet now soon to retire Kate who greeted him with the same smile from 5 years ago. He wishes her a good morning and stops in his tracks, his gut telling him to visit room nine. He frowns as he stops himself from going into Phil's office and instead upstairs on autopilot. He raises to knock on the door only to see that it's open. He quietly steps inside to see one of the oldest "children" with his back against Phil and a nurse._ _

_ _ When John mentioned things changed he also meant that once Victoria passed away it was mandatory for the people at strawberry fields to swipe any trace of her in room nine to make room for another desperate child in need. At first John did not like this. Not one bit. _ _

_ _/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / _ _

_ _ _Two years ago_ _John was 20 and newly married. He was on his way to collect Victoria's belonging receiving the call only two days ago. He parked half a block away wanting to walk and reminisce on the memories he made there. Sadly enough though the occasion, John felt pretty happy as he tried not to dwell on the negative. Being surrounded by wooded areas and plants made him feel right at home. He walked, pausing to greet Kate with a simple ' Alright Kate??' In which she responded with a 'as alright as an old hag like me can be' before she sent him with a wink and visitors tag. Once standards were met he went upstairs and opened the door to room nine and was met with a screech and a skinny hand throwing what seemed to be a guitar pick at his face_ _ ___

__

_ _ _ "Dont you know how to fucking knock son?" The kid muttered in his brave moment of fury as he went to collect his thrown guitar pick. John was still In shock of the altercation before snapping his head up_ _ _

_ _ _ "S-son? You're a kid don't fucking come so casual like we've known each other!" He cussed out as he rubbed his chin which was victim of the lunatic long child._ _ _

_ _ _ He was told that Victoria's room would already be filled by a boy named Geroge Harrison who's parents had giving him up simply because they had enough kids as it is without the shiet economy slaving over them. They told he was sassy and quiet and rarely spoke to anyone if anybody at the children's home. John clicked his tongue in annoyance as this kid had the nerve to get chatty with him._ _ _

_ _ _ "How old are you anyway son, your skinny arse can pass as a twelve year old but your scowl can pass as a sixy four year old" he sneered as he invited himself further in and sitting on a small bean bag. He looked around and tried to imagine how the room used to look like. George on the other hand judging by the scowl on his face and the judgment in his eyes was not as amused._ _ _

_ _ _ "I'm seventeen now get your shitty arse off me bean bag and head out the door you dodgy bloke" the boy(young adult??) Spat out as he went back to playing his beat up, botched looking guitar._ _ _

_ _ _ John was about to tell this young(old??) Tosser to fuck off when he recognized the old tune of Raunchy coming from the guitar. He felt as if his troubles had grown wings and flown off into the sun. That's why he got up and sat next to George a smile plastered on his face as he asked _ _ _

_ _ _"Know any Elvis??" _ __

__

_ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ Every time John visited he always checked up on George. He had quickly became his favorite person, them getting along fairly quickly (almost suspiciously it was weird how much they had in common) talking about music, playing guitar,and buddy holly. He had even asked george if he considered being 'adopted' by his aunt so he could leave strawberry fields. George had sensed his sincerity but refused saying that he was almost the age of an adult which allowed him to leave by himself without having to be unfortunately 'related' to John(ouch)._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ Ever since the accident happened John had been too busy wallowing in his own misery to only be told over phone that George was seeing a therapist to help his refusal to talk to anyone. In John's eyes, he seemed to only be getting worse. George was now eighteen, nineteen in a few days and Phil was refusing to let him leave adult or not if he didn't make progress. That seemed to cut the final straw for George._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "C'mon son sooner or later you're gonna hav' to speak up or else your skinny arse ain't going nowhere" Phil said angrily as he snatched the pen and paper from George hands. In all his years of knowing George he had never seen him so...scared.._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ John shook his head as he saw the scene unravel, Geroge refusing to talk or make eye contact the entire time. It was about to escalate when Phil decided he had enough and threw the paper and pen against a wall and stood up in a menacing fashion that made George flinch. Before thing else could happen John cleared his throat and calmly said_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "Mr. Spector I thought I'd drop by to review some of your overdue taxes but seeing as you're too busy-"he said pretending to write a deduction on the Phil's taxation paper before he was interrupted by a panicked_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "NO!No n--No Mister Lennon was just uh- clearing something up with a resident" he stuttered as he patted Georges head in an awkward and dodgy manner. _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "Lets- why don't we talk in my office? Better here then aha here..follow me" Phil wiped the sweat off his head as he walked out of the room at a relatively quick pace. John followed his movement with his eyes before muttering a quick 'ta George' and patting his shoulder before following Mr. Spector into his office._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°]°_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "I like to take a non Codswallop approach.. you see last year wow..I cut the cost rate of this old strawberry in half I mean I-if that doesn't show you dedication I don't know what will you see...."_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ John had listen for Mr. Spector go on for two minutes and fourty five seconds, three hundred and thirty nine words- three fourty seven if you count all the words he repeated and or stuttered. He zoned out once again as he heard Spector boast about cutting the cost of the children's home in half. _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ When heard of Phil Spector he wanted to know everything about the man. After all he was behind strawberry fields so he began to investigate. He investigated until he knew what he thought was everything. From his history of being an orphan, to his medical issues. He knew that Phil needed a bone marrow transplant but he couldn't afford to pay for the surgery already paying for the children homes needs. When John heard that he immediately knew he was one of the people he had to help, but he needed to make sure he was a good person. Sure he was a little dodgy and weird but an alright guy that was desperate for a second chance. At least that was what he had been thinking before the strange interaction between Spector and Harrison._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "Now if only I got me own personal piggy bank settled I uh wouldn't have you here.." He said said as he licked his dry lips and gave a sleazy smile._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "I see.. is that your brand new Bentley out there?"John questioned not forgetting how looking at the car parked in the space meant for Spector made his stomach weirdly churn. Phil's smile dropped as he look down and spoke_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ " Y-you see lad when I heard that my bone marrow transplant was no good I-I t-thought that--that everything was gonna-"_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "I'm well aware of your ongoing medical history Mr. Spector-"he muttered under his breath before he was interrupted by the man who seemed to sweat more and more by the second._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "Things aren't looking very promising for me son, I-i have a a little extra bonus coming in on January but until then I d-desperately need this six month e-extension lad I really am doing my best here.." He fiddled with his hands. He always did that when he talked about serious things like this. John contemplated his options._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ What can a person do when they are uncertain about another? Do they reject to offer them help? Or do you take the benefit of the doubt and hope for the best. At times like this John wished he knew everything. But now he doesn't so he'll have to settle for now._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "Well I hope your medical issues get settled into place or else I'll be burying you in your expenses Mr. Spector. I'll see you in 6 months" God he hoped he was right about him. He stood and shook his hand ignoring how he repeatedly thanked him before walking out of the office._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ As he was about to sign out, the hair on his arms stood and his stomach churned. Something didn't seem right. He had almost forgotten to vist George._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ He sent his signature smile to Kate before quickly heading upstairs losing his tie on his suit before knocking three times on the door of room nine. _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ When no response came he took the liberty of coming in hoping that George was decent- he was but he was sat in his bed fiddling with his guitar. As he sent a quick "alright Georgie?" He noticed that he was playing 'All I Have to Do Is Dream' a song he only played when he had bad days. Gathering by the looks of things he was to going to get nowhere talking at george more than to him. So he gently grabbed his guitar and set it down._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "Alright bruv, how have you been Georgie? Hanging in there?"Nothing. As suspected(correctly) he didn't say a word just merely making eye contact a spilt second before looking away.  
"Look I know I haven't been such a great mate since the accident- for a while now and that's on me. But I can help you if you help me. I need to know what kind of person Mr. Phil Spector is. I have the power to drastically change his life for the better."He said as gently touched Georges hand immediately noticing how he swallowed harshly at the mention of the latter's name._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "Its me John you can trust me just let me help you Georgie- I want you to be happy." He said as he reached over and grabbed the pen and paper that was thrown moments prior._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "Look you don't have to tell me just-you can write it alright?" George looked at the pair that was set on his lap before looking at John with big confused eyes. There was a moment were John saw so much pain in them and George and saw the pain in John's. So Geo decided to do them both a favor and closed his eyes before opening hem and picking up the paper and pen. He winced as he began to write in small neat handwriting. John waited patiently as he saw George slightly struggle before handing it over to John. _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ " 'The soap they give me to for showering smells like marmite. I don't like it, I want a new one' well I think that's perfectly reasonable lad. What else? You can trust me" he reassured George when he gave him weary look. _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ Georges lips quivered as his eyes became glossy with tears. His hands shook as he tried to compose himself to write again. He let out a small whimper before furiously wiping his forming tears and handing John the notepad._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "He's...h-he's--he's punishing you? How is he punishing you? How.. how is he punishing you George?"He asked his smile dropping instantly as he gripped the notepad almost crushing it completely when George opened his mouth to answer. Instead of words incoherent sobs came out of the poor boy as his hands shook, not being able to withstand his emotions any longer. John looked at Geo and put his hands to his face to hide his jaw clenching and the tears forming in his eyes as he saw the younger lad completely break down. His whole body shook as he sobbed wiping his tears out of embarrassment._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _«»«»«»«»«»«»«»««»»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»«»_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ It was quiet and peaceful out in the hall way of the children's home. But if you were to put your ear very closely up against the wall you could hear it all coming down and crashing. _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ John and managed to put George in a wheel chair(the poor lad being too weak to even walk on his own) and wheel him down the hall trying to find the kitchen and or a worker, inevitably catching the eyes of Mr. Spector and a near by nurse. Once they caught up to John and George Phil tried his best to keep what he thought was a casual tone_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "H--hey there hey lad what are you doing?-"_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "Where's the washroom" John said harshly into his face, his veins popping out of his neck, face red in anger. If anyone were able to see what John saw all they would see would be red. That how furious he was. Once he was pointed in the direction he got a hold of a near by nurse he gave her specific instructions._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "Let him take a Bath with whatever soap he chooses, fix him a decent fucking meal, and let him get his belongings in order for him to leave right NOW." He said as he ruffled George's hair and started to walk back to get his belongings._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "O-o-of course yes yes, um- Mr. -Mr lennon I-I think you might have the wrong I-impression you see-"_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "Me and me trusty social worker friend are gonna stop by from time to time now that you've not only managed to niff me but the very bloody people I seem to give a shit about,to make sure you're showing these kids some fuckin bloody respect you useless tosser" John grabbed his brief case and was almost out the door before he turned back and spat out_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "You fuckin don't treat people like that- I-I'm not giving you a six month extension-I'm it giving you shet" he was reeled back like a fish out of water after hearing the audacity Phil had_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "Just let me explain o-okay??JOHN!! JOHN JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME EXPLAIN- Please just-" he was interrupted by John grabbing his chin forcibly, shaking him harshly with every word he spoke_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ "I-I almost believed you..I-I almost bloody fucking believed you son of bitch"John grabbed his head and smashed it against the glass fire extinguisher case before storming out leaving children and staff to gasp about the situation._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ 'Fuck fuck fuck fuckin hell. Fuck fuck.'_ John thought to himself as he buckled. He punched the wheel with both of his hands before taking a deep breath. He managed to cool down remembering that driving unfocused is what caused the _accident_ in the first place. Once he felt calm enough he rubbed his face and tried to rub off this horrible day and sped off away from the beautiful but torturous strawberry fields.____ _ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yikes sorry George:( I guess I never really thought about how most of this story is angst but it will get happy :) *coughthenmostlysadcough* Next chapter Johnny boy will get to meet our dearest Paulie!! Hopefully it'll turn out ok ;))


	3. Like Little Girls and Boys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He pulled out pen and paper before asking "And Paul was his name..Paul..?"
> 
> "McCartney"
> 
> "ah Paul McCartney..Well thanks anyway Linda I appreciate it as always."He said as he kissed her cheek before leaving a hundred pounds on the table and walking out he door. He ignored Linda's panicked "John this is too much" as he got into his car. He smiled himself as he buckled. He had found his seventh person..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> {Edit: Jesus I'm sorry I just saw that it didn't include the Harrison part so I added it quickly sorryyyyy}
> 
> Hello I'm sorry for being late, I had this chapter ready to go on Friday but the site kept on crashing (totally not because I'm using a kindle fire and bing to write this) so I had to rewrite it about five times. It's a bit long too!! I hope you don't mind. Also if you didn't notice I rewrote the first chapter which might have some important things. You can read it if you're not too sick of me yet!! <3

George Harrison was a pig. Well that's what everyone told him. No not because he made sleazy comments towards women or men,( no his mother raised him right.) It was because he always ate as if it was his last meal for the next five hundred days. In his younger days while he was still with his family, they were always amazed at the lads astonishing fast metabolism that allowed him to eat as much as he wanted with out gaining a pound. Where ever you saw him he had always food or was eating. That was him when he was happy.

When his parents left him at strawberry fields they had told it was because they couldn't provide for him. Being an fifteen year old he didn't buy it. He blamed himself for not being enough, or not being the perfect child. He had come to the conclusion that it was because of how much he ate. Certainly being an already big family they couldn't feed him as much as he wanted to eat.

So he punished himself by not eating. That mentality changed when he met Phil Spector and John Lennon.

John helped him change for the better and even helped him get rid of that mentality. He started to eat the way he used to and allowed himself to be happy. When John stopped showing up that's when Phil started to show up more. He always saw Phil around he orphanage but never had a decent conversation with him to actually know the man. Once he did, he wished he never even thought about him. It started off small.

Lingering touches, staring, checkups every night which all made George extremely uncomfortable. Then it escalated to worse--God so much worse. Then one night George had enough. He spat in his face and refused to play along. So Phil punished him. Every time he spoke. BAM. Smack to the face or kick in the back. It eventually got to getting his food privileges taken away. And if he wanted his food he would have to return a disgusting favor. So George would usually starve.

But on the nights when his stomach aced and begged to be filled with, food George would go into Phil's office and leave with tears and snot streaming down his face and a small peanut butter sandwich with a small bag of walnuts. He _never_ ate the walnuts. After learning that Phil would not let him leave he felt hopeless. So he planned the only escape he knew. A noose. He sobbed for hours that night as he thought of when his family left him. They had told him that the strawberry fields would provide a better life for him. Yeah fucking right. It had only gotten worse. Until John came back and it wasn't.

_ _

_ _[¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥][¥] _ _

_ _John looked like a creep. He had the balls to admit that if anyone were to see what he was doing they would call the police on him. Hell he'd call the police. But at least progress was made in him admiring his fault. He readjusted himself as his knees started to feel sore._ _

He was knelt in a near by Bush that had a perfect view of the strapping lad. John had been here for about thirty minutes and was not happy about it. His original plan was to follow Mr McCartney to the hospital and wait for him to come out of his appointment. He would then casually run into him and follow through his plans. His appointments usually would only be twenty to thirty minutes but when he woke up from his accidental nap and asked the nurse who was making googly eyes at him what the time was, he had learned that an hour and a half had passed. He freaked out when he had learned that paul had left the appointment about five minutes before he woke up. He luckily paced back and forth and was about to leave when he spotted the brown haired man sitting in a hospital gown. And guessing on the deep frown on his face and the daze he was in, John guessed it was not a good result.

So he resulted to plan B, which was hiding like a goddamn freak and wait until Paul returned to his newly assigned room. Luckily for him only two minutes after deciding that John would shoot himself McCartney was escorted by the same nurse from earlier to his room. He sighed as he stood up, dusting his dirty pants of any debris before slowly following the pair only to be stopped by the lady at the front desk asking what he wanted.

"I uh I'm here to vist Mr. McCartney-- Paul McCartney it's kind of important you see-" he said as he pulled up his little taxman badge that had made this whole scheme possible. The lady clicked her younger before lifting her saggy and wrinkly old hand to point to a sign that told the visiting hours. 

"Its five past eight Mr. Taxman unfortunately our visiting hours are closed good day sir" the old hag had looked away before John could even emphasize that this would very quick and was extremely important. He couldn't get a word out before she repeated her self and went to type something. 

_Fuck. Damn. All right. Guess he would have to wait until tomorrow. Shit.. Unless..._

Paul had finally started to fall asleep as his newly appointed medication kicked in. Today.. Today was--not a good day. He had learned that his heart condition would only get worse in the long run. That even if there was a donor with their heart on a steaming platter ready to go, the expenses of all his other surgeries, appointments and Vista would be impossible to pay since the Tax people had his income UN-frozen which left him with not a drop of time to attempt to pay back the money.

He was utterly screwed.

It was a shit situation but Paul couldn't focus on the fact that he was going to die soon. He had focused on that nearly all his life. He was more focused on the fact that he was going to do it all alone.( well besides Martha who he specially bought, knowing that she would only live a few years like him). His family- bless them- was only Micheal and his wife but they were all the way in New York and couldn't come if they wanted to, the expenses being the main reason.

He didn't go out much due to his condition so his only friends were the nurses who wanted to get in his pants. He doesn't see them very often since he moved across the hospital( his condition only worsening) and he told them that they could touch his cock or him all he wanted it wouldn't do a thing since he was an utterly flamboyant self pronounced gay.(He recalls they day he was finally fed up with all the flirting and told them off. It still makes him smile- he means he still feels pity for them).

He was half into his dream when he felt a pair of eyes on him. Thinking it was mearly just the dream he was having he shook it off before he felt a presence near him. He slightly turned his body and tried to open his eyes but was proven to be difficult due to the strong medication. Once he did finally managed he had only seen the back of a man with a bowl like haircut and auburn hair. That was the last thing he remembered seeing before the over powering sweet relief of sleep took over him and caused him pass out.

  
John gave a strong hug to George before closing the door and walking down the stairs. It was the next day and He had gone shopping with the lad to celebrate him getting his own apartment. John had made sure to let him know how proud he was for being so brave and getting on with his life by spoiling him with ton and tons of groceries and house warming presents. He still remembers how Georges face slightly flushed as John fussed over him at the store.

_'M' not a kid ya'know I can take care of me self perfectly fine'_ not two seconds passed before Georges eyes widened at his favorite snack being placed in the basket. He said nothing further.

John smiled as he recalled the memory and placed his keys in his cars ignition. His smile was quickly wiped off as he realized what he was doing.

He wasn't supposed to get close with anyone during the process. He would only hurt them afterwards and hurting people was the last thing he needed.

Fuck.. He thought to himself as he brought up his cellphone and clicked on Georges contact. His finger wandered over the block button before shaking his head. George would only be upset if he had suddenly lost all contact with him. So instead he opted to drive to Stu's instead.

John cleared his throat before tapping on Stu's shoulder. He had tracked Stu and his wife Astrid down at a painting event were artist would create their own little creations and were put up against each other. Stu's eyes widened and his smile faltered as soon as he saw John. John had played it off like he didn't see it.

"Oh! JOHN vhat a lovely surprise to see you here! Vhy are you here? To join us perhaps?" Astrid said, her accent only being slightly present. She was getting better at English (stu was sure to mention it many, many times.)

"Oh Hello Astrid I'm just checking up on stu and making sure you're till kicking is arse at everything" he fake chuckled before casting a quick glance at Stu. He was looking at the floor with such intensity that if his eyes were lasers there'd be two peep sized holes.

Stu spoke up over Astrid interpreting her by giving her a small peck before standing.

"Excuse us love we be back in a jiff" he gave Astrid a sweet smile before giving John nod, signaling to follow him outside. Once outside Stu hugged John as gave him a bitter sweet smile before asking

"Hey lad what- uh are you up to?-"

"Cor cut the shit Stu, you said you'd call me the thirteenth and its the fifteenth- why--why haven't you called me? You promised" John said as he rubbed his face in frustration. He had his plan meticulously made and it had took him a whole year and a have to put it together. He couldn't let Stu get in the way best friend or not.

"John the doctor didn't call me until yesterday and when he did he said that no results were made mate I'm not trying to" Stu said voice cracking toward the end signaling the emotion he had in his voice. He was interrupted up an unstable Impatient John who you could call a ticking bomb.

"STILL-still you should still call me stu no matter what.. you what?- never mind I need you to take care of something" John had stopped mid sentence to pull out a small piece of paper from his suit

"I've done a mistake an got to close to Harrison--I don't want him to get hurt.. I need you to text him in two day saying that I changed my number to yours. Keep the chat casual and minimal- make any excuse needed not to see him- he CANNOT find out" he grabbed Stu's hand and put the paper gently before closing his fist.

Stu shook his head as his eyes became wattery. "Yes God okay John..are you really going to-"

"YES STU...Yes.." He interrupted before knocking on the glass and wavering a goodbye to Astrid who waved back a cheerful wave and blow a kiss. John pretend to catch it and put it in his pocket before looking Stu in the eyes and sternly saying

"Do as you promised" John walked away quickly as he fished for keys to his car. Once he did he started the engine and took off not looking back .

After finally cooling off two things had happened to John.

Firstly he had finally found the pets Store for the rich where they sold the jellyfish he had been obsessing about getting. He had no idea why the old women with four gold teeth was selling the creatures but quite frankly he didn't care. So after sighing and paying the women they had both agreed to the jellyfish being delivered in five days.

Secondly, he had received a phone call. Not just any phone call but a very awkward, anger filling, nervous phone call from Alphred, John's 'father '.

_ "Hey lad I was just uh calling to y'know make sure you were doing alright you having not vist me in a while and last time you kind of rushed out and things were said and well uh I wanted to make sure you were breathing y'know and Miami said-" John had listened to the old hag for about 3o seconds before en enesting his panicked thoughts._

_ Shit...shit fucking cock.. did he notice? After the surgery John had only stayed for what was necessary and planned to leave in a rush when Alphred had insisted he stay so that they could chat. In a moment of panic and frustration John had yelled out_

_ "MY GOD ALPHRED I DID THIS TO CLEAR MY CONSCIENCE YOU'VE DONE NOTHING THEREFORE NOTHING HAS CHANGED BETWEEN US." While Alphred had gone upstairs to retrieve John's bag , John had already gone into his office and stole what he needed and left._

_ Fuck he couldn't know.. it would soil everything. John cleared his throat before interrupting the old hag "Yes yes.. I know I'm fine just...how-- how did you get this number? You know what never mind I stand by what I said last time to please don't contact me again-"_

_ "Alright alright just one.. one more thing did..did you take something of mine when you w-were over last time?"he questioned and John felt his heart drop to his Arse as his voice ringed through his head._

_ Fuck the old cock had found out.. fuck.. John never knew how to handle confrontation so he did the only thing he did know to do._

_Explode._

_ "No alphy I didnt take anything but do..I don't know..do you remember WHAT I FUCKING LEFT YOU WITH?HUH?? I GAVE YOU SOMETHING VERY MOTHER FUCKING SPECIAL HUH ALPHRED? AND YOU STILL HAVE THE AUDICTY TO CALL ME AND PRETEND TO CARE ABOUT THE CHARITY THAT IS CARING ABOUT YOUR SON, ONLY TO ASK ME IF I STOLE SOMETHING!?? FUCK OFF YOU DINGY, LITTLE FAGGOT" he yelled harshly before hanging up, leaving no time for Alphred's apologies to reach his ears as he immediately blocked his number._

What a fucking shit day this had become .

After driving around for what seemed hours John had finally cleared his head.

_'Stu promised me he would follow through and Stu never breaks his promises.. He'll come through..hell help me with Alph... Hell keep his promise..he wont break it...he can't..especially this one..'_ John didn't realize it but he was parked outside the cafe John, Cynthia and Julian used to go every Sunday. And well it was where he first saw paul.

_John chuckled as Julian squirmed when Cynthia pressed a delicate and sweet kiss to John's cheek. It was Sunday after noon, five minutes till four and the trio were heading off to Linda's Baked goods and more. It was a little cafe-bakery that the Lennons had adopted their own seeing as they came here every Sunday since Julian learned to walk._

_ John set Julian down from his neck as he opened the door for his wife and child, then entered. He was greeted by Linda, a lively American young women who came here to pursue her dream of photography and who opened a little bakery on the side to help with finances._

_ John said a quick hello before ordering the usual. He sat down and looked at his lovely wife and son who were playing a game of who ever can say the biggest number wins (which had unsurprisingly lasted more than fifteen minutes God Julian was so smart and he was immensely proud of it) when he received a message._

_ He looked down to see that it was his work trying to talk to him to sell more of his art. He sighed before grudgingly replying which caught the eye of Cynthia. Normally Cynthia was very understanding and kind but for two weeks every time they tried to go out and do something as a family or even just the two of them, John's work would get in the way._

_She tried to understand at first seeing that John seemed to hate having to tackle work while spending time with his family, but as time went on John seemed more and more unbothered as Cynthia became more bothered._

_"Everything alright John?"she asked as he tickled Julian on the side. She wanted to distract him before he started to ask questions on why his da had stopped having fun._

_"Yeah just some work factory bullshit" John cursed as he smirked at his phone, replying quickly before putting his phone away._

_Fed up by John's cursing around Julian and the constant interruptions Cynthia, the poor women, spoke her mind_

_"Please John don't curse around Julian, I don't want to go around and explain to his playmates parents on why he picked up such peculiar words..-"she hesitated before continuing with a sense of newly found confidence "and really it doesn't seem like nothing since they haven't left you alone for weeks.."_

_John paused and put down the pastry he was enjoying. Julian scooted farther away from his mother sensing another fight since his dad always was extremely quiet before exploding._

_"Jesus Christ Cyn why do you have to go and spoil a moment like that. it's like you're trying to make our family more goddamn more miserable than it already is I mean for fucks sake..." he said as he glared at Cynthia who was now shaking her head in disbelief._

_"Me?? Me make our family more miserable?? John you're hardly home and--and when you are you're always interrupted by work stuff it's-it's tearing us apart, our family, our marriage.. it's not me Johnny it's-it's you for Christ's sake." Shee argued back. She knew it was no good to argue with John Lennon seeing as he was the master of words but she couldn't help but to voice how upset she was._

_ John on the other hand didn't wait to voice how upset he was either. He had taken out his family to spend time with and he gets a few messages from work. It's not liked he waited for them to text him, he was needed and plus he needed to do this to provide for them. But Cynthia doesn't understand... she never does._

_"Well I didn't fucking propose to you and ask for your hand did I? No you did with that bloody positive pregnancy test and now when I'm trying to fuckin provide for you, you begin to question me? You've taken my freedom and my happiness what the else do you fucking want??"He spat out visually as he slammed his first against the table._

_He breathed heavily and looked away when he saw his son cowering in fear of the fight that was unraveling before his very own eyes. He glanced quickly to find that Cynthia was at a lost for words. She cleared her throat before wiping the tears that were forming and stood. She quickly got up and got her purse and to go box before taking Julians hand, the little boy refusing to go not understanding why they had to leave if he didn't get to finish._

_"But mummy why do we hav' to go? I didn't finsh my truffle" he asked when he was abruptly pulled to his feet by Cynthia._

_"We'll be in the car waiting to go home and try to enjoy what's left of this horrid day. When you don't find us much of a burden, we'll be waiting in the car for you to take your 'wife' and 'son' home." Cynthia had managed to drag a crying Julian who repeatedly said that he wanted to stay with daddy out the shop and into the car._

_ John silently cursed as he had gucked his own ass and stood up. He left a generous tip to Linda who did a mighty fine job of pretending not to witness what had had opened. He looked at the piano in the corner and played every single key with a flick of his wrist before leaving the store outside to his family.. family.. John's family.._

He remembered that exactly two years after the accident and into his plan he was fed up about the fact that he felt like complete a failure. He was grieving immensely seeing that it was the two year anniversary since it had happened, and he couldn't find a a seventh person to help.

He had listed 

\- Pete Best,

-George Martin,

-Pattie Boyd,

-Phil Spector,

-Linda Eastman,

-Richard Starkey

but for all that was good and holy John couldn't find a person that was suitable for receiving such a life changing gift. So he went to the only place he went to grieve in peace.

Linda's bakery.

Not only was it his place his family's place- was his family's place but it also had delicious foods plus he could make even more progress with helping Linda. So he sat in the back, the front tables being strangely taken.

He heard a soft melodic song and a beautiful voice matching it so he took it upon himself to guess that there was live entertainment. When Linda came to ask for his order she confirmed his thoughts by giving him a brief summary of the young man who was playing.

He was a young handsome lad named Paul who played the piano occasionally from to to time for a free meal,(not that he needed one but refused to take any money Linda had taken it upon herself to pay him in delicious treats.) John thanked Linda before starting another conversation about her condition.

She had breast cancer a few years prior meeting John and was absolutely devastated when she learned that she had also gained liver cancer. She seemed almost beening with joy when he asked, saying that a donor specially reached out to help her, a lad that was 22 and was relatively healthy.

She joked about marrying the guy when John had butted in saying that there must be something with the lad if he was giving his bits and pieces away. Linda gave an awkward smile before walking away to place Johns order. John looked around awkwardly as drummed a random beat on the table when the crowd had finally died down. He looked up to see and hear that the young man was no longer playing but standing and talking to a near by worker.

Now John hasn't 'checked out' a person since the incident with Cynthia and Julian happened but he couldn't help it. The man , who's named he remembers being told was 'Paul', was leaning slightly against the counter as he spoke.

His hips slightly shakes as laughter came out of the plumpest lips John ever seen. He was tall and skinny, not to the point where it was just skin and bones but where you could see that he never ate for boredom.

His hair was shiny under the light which made him look even more like an angel and there was a slight blush that was forming on his cheeks as he talked to the other women. He-- women.

John's eyes widened as he realized he had been drooling over a man. Last time he checked he wasn't gay, being engaged to a women and having a very fulfilling sex life with her.

Maybe it was those eyes that had such thick lashed sprouting from them that made him think of when birds applied that black gunk on theirs.

Or maybe it was the way his ears slightly poked out from his styled 'bowl cut' that remained him of Bridget Bardot when her hair was short. Or maybe it was his nice and round bum that stook out--

what ever it was he couldn't stop from his heart nearly beating out of his chest as 'Paul' walked out the door not before shooting a smile at the staring Lennon(he might have been drooling for all he knows)

John got up immediately before Linda managed to scare him right out of his jumper when she brought his order to him. In a moment of curiosity John babbled out what he could call a sentence

"W-where's..--where's he going" he pointed at paul who was still in the parking lot petting a dog who had went by.

"Oh Paul you mean? He's got a vist at the hospital he has to attend to-,poor things got a terrible heart condition-"

"Wait. R-really? Like life or death? How do you know him? Is he any good at being a person?- I mean is he a y'know good person- takes the trash out, help old granny, recycles-"

"Jesus John whats your deal?" She questioned as she saw a bright red blush forming on his cheeks. He had been caught. Linda smiled slightly before continuing.

" I first met him when I was picking up a book for Heather at the library. Helped me find it- he volunteers at the children's library. Then I saw him at the hospital when I was getting treatment for my liver, he said he was there because of his heart failure problems,yes very serious.. but he then insisted on meeting up since we kept on running in to each other. Once we sat down and chatted, I figured out he liked to play music I invited him to play. One of the nicest men I ever met- except for the fact that he never takes any money for the-" she rambled as John nodded to himself.

He pulled out pen and paper before asking "And Paul was his name..Paul..?"

"McCartney"

"ah Paul McCartney..Well thanks anyway Linda I appreciate it as always."He said as he kissed her cheek before leaving a hundred pounds on the table and walking out he door. He ignored Linda's panicked "John this is too much" as he got into his car. He smiled himself as he buckled. He had found his seventh person..

<«»><«»><«»><«»><«»><«»>

Because of the fond memories He always came here when he felt lost. That's why when he stepped inside he panicked once seeing Paul chatting up Linda.

He didn't want to or plan to see him here. That's why the second John had sensed that Paul was to turn he ran into the restroom lock the stall behind him. So much for a peaceful afternoon.

He looked out the window in worry when he heard the bathroom door opened. A little bit of him inside died once he heard a smooth voice(the same beautiful voice he remembers singing) call out and say

"You alright here mate? Just wanted to check on you after seeing you speed away..." After hearing no result the curiosity got the best of Paul as he leaned down to check to see if he saw any feet.

Much to his surprise he saw nothing and when he knocked on the Stoll it opened. He peered inside before uttering a small hello before his eyes scrunched up in confusion after seeing no one and the restroom window opened.

He scratched his head before shrugging his shoulders and stepping outside to tell Linda of the weird incident.

<«»><«»><«»><«»><«»><«»><«»><«»>

It was the seventeenth and John was back at the hospital once again. He would have came yesterday, hating the fact that he could have made progress sooner, but kept on reliving the embarrassing incident that happened at the bakery. He shook his head slightly before sipping his drink and going back to reading his book.

He was at the cafeteria making glances at a little boy who had his head shaved due to cancer playing cars and trucks. He casted a sweet smile at the boy who giggled upon the sight. John made his signature funny face before smiling and returning to his book finally at peace.

Paul on the other hand was..confused to say the less. He was at the hospitals cafeteria enjoying his fruit salad when be felt a pair of steel eyes watching him. Feeling slightly uncomfortable, he moved behind a young boy with toy cars and his family.

Paul had checked himself in after feeling extremely dizzy and weak after barely walking out of the restroom and into the same room where Linda was. He had stayed a day and a half before being discharged the doctors only saying that his condition was already worsening.

He figedeted and moaned out of frustration when he felt the same eyes staring at him but stronger. Annoyed at the unwanted attention he dropped his fork into his salad and looked up only to meet eyes with a handsome man dressed in a suit with a similar haircut to him(the only difference was the length and that the stranger had locks of gorgeous auburn hair) staring back.

Or was he?

The man appears to be staring at paul but then at the boy in front of him confirming when he heard the boy giggle at the man crossing his eyes. Paul had enough when he saw the man smile directly at him. Being fed up with confusion Paul stood and threw his salad. He was thrown off when the man made a silly face at the boy but then smiled at paul. After standing in silence and utter confusion Paul walked over to the man in order to confirm his thoughts. The man's head snapped up slightly as Paul went on and voiced what he had been thinking

"Are you perhaps looking at me or the boy" Paul tilted his head further confused by the man clicking his younger in annoyance and putting his book down

"Actually I'm just sitting here- am I doing it wrong?"He asked before giving Paul what seemed a forced polite smile. Suddenly a wave of familiarity came over Paul. The man made Paul's insides tinge and not just because of his good looks. Suddenly the memory of a man running into the bathroom two days prior, replayed in his memory and he asked

"Actually now that think about it.. you look quite familiar.. didn't I see you at a cafe or something?" He questioned mysterious man. He furrowed his eyebrows as he saw the man pull out what seemed like a badge from the tax people. The man's voice completed his guess when he said.

"Yes.. yes that was me.. you're being audited my name is John Lennon, and you owe her majesty fifty six hundred thousand pounds and nineteen pence" 'John' finished off with a smile as he reached under the table and pulled out a brief case.

He then proceed to pull out documents with Paul's name on all of them.

_ 'Shit'_ Paul thought to himself. Suddenly he hated his curiosity for dragging him over here only to be awarded with a scolding from the tax people.

"I know.." He said quietly, feeling already stressed out about being in yet another situation he had no control over.

John on the other hand almost seemed delighted to have to tell off poor Paul.

"So now you have the joy of meeting me." He said sarcastically before continuing "Have a seat son, with your habit of not paying this could be a while. I've been looking over your income statement s over these three years from 2017 2018 2019 and 2020-" he was actively interrupted by Paul who asked him a daring question.

"Were you in my room the other night?" Paul needed to know once he got the same tingly feeling of remembrance after his memory replayed the other night when he felt a presence in his room.

"Sorry to burst your bubble but No Mr. McCartney, I wasn't in your room I'm a taxman not a Damn prostitute.... So I was looking over-" he was interrupted by Paul who had shrunken in his chair due to the quick topic change. He let out tired sigh before continuing

"Mr lennon I just got discharged so unless you're going to send me to a dungeon I'd like to scrub the hospital smell of me first" Paul pulled of his best most intense puppy eyes ever(looking even more pitiful with the thirty bags underneath them)

John was agitated and angry as hell as he looked into his puppy eyes. He paused before regaining his composture managing the fakest smile he could muster and answered. "Sure Mr. McCartney, take your sweet arse time..I'll be in touch" John stood and tipped his imaginary hat he walked away further from Paul until he was outside and into his car.

_'FUCKFUCK FUCKING BULL SHIT' _John screamed to himself. He had waited and waited patiently until Princess over here was ready and at the last minute he's too tired to have a life changing talk?

_'Well not for fucking long'._.. He cursed loudly and slammed his fists against the miniature mirror breaking it in his fit of anger. After managing to calm down he shook the glass of his bleeding hand and sighed.

He paused before smirking and muttering something about being _'a fucking genuius'_ and rummaged through his paperwork to find Paul's adress.

You would have to try a lot harder to get rid of John Winston Lennon. Paul would soon learn that. Once memorizing the adress he sped off. Paul had no idea what was going to hit him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My God John when will you learn that your actions have CoNseQuences. Well that's it. Until next chapter. Carry on.


	4. Playing with their little toys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I just... why do I get the feeling you're doing me one of the greatest favors of my life?" he questioned not caring how lost he sounded. John simply responded with a 
> 
> "Because I get the feeling your really deserve it" before opening the front door, giving paul one last breath taking smile and leaving through it. "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hellooo sorry for the wait, I had to makeup a weeks worth of school work celebrate my birthday then I got sick again:/ anywho excuses excuses, here's the new chapter!! Please enjoy and let me know what you think so far!!!

Stu often looks back on how he met John Lennon. It was a crisp and cold morning of his second day in year two and stu was beyond frustrated.

His mother had said that he couldn't bring his newly colored pens to his art class because they'd only be mixed with the less expensive ones. He hated how snotty and entitled his mother acted even at the age six, so he left with a frown on his face as he stomped around his school until the bell rang. Typically his mother would stay with him but that particular morning she had to meet up with her new friend who's name was Daniel.

Stu's mother _very_ much liked him as he always spent the night when his dad wasn't home and when he had nightmares. In her hurry and haze of impatient lust for her lover, she had not realized that she didn't pack his lunch (which wasn't really a problem seeing as he can just get some from the cafeteria) but also physical education uniform (which was an extreme problem) which had caused him to not only get in trouble and caned but he was also left on the side not allowed to join the other children during the activities.

Stu felt as miserable as a six year old could he. But at least he wasn't alone. There had been another child sitting about four feet away from him. He had rosey cheeks, auburn hair and was neatly dressed but had a frown stitched onto his mouth. He too had gotten in trouble, but not for being unprepared but for calling a little girl a 'gormless slag' when she kept asking the question of why he lived with his aunt and not his mother. None of the children turned cheek at the insult thrown (the children being too young to understand) expect for, ironically, the slag that was the teachers understudy.

While bearing a face as white as snow she had dragged young John Lennon all the way across from the children, had the audticy to humiliate him by whacking his bum four times in front of everybody and setting him aside with Stuart. The poor boy was angrily wiping his tears as the little girl he had insulted him and threw the v sign at him before skipping away.

Stu looked at the boy before sighing in sadness. What a cruddy day this had become. For him and for 'John Winston Lennon' (as he was adressed from the whore). He picked up his bag and began to search through it looking for his colored pencils. Unbeknownst to him, a ball was heading straight towards poor ole Stu. Before even processing what was going to happen he was shoved aside by John who had pushed him away harshly in a moment of panic and haste. He looked up at John who had gone back to sulking in the corner like nothing had happened. But in that moment Stu _knew_.

_He knew_ that he was going to be following John Lennon to the end of earth and he made him a drawing of the daft, minger, cow who had whacked him and the little girl who had teased him as crossed eyed, snaggle toothed with incredible big heads to prove it. It had raised a chuckle out of John and a smile that confirmed that there friendship was to last a lifetime. With a smile and a handshake exchanged between to them their friend ship was confirmed. Stu kept his promise to always stay to John's side.

From his first fight in secondary school, their first shared curious kiss in freshman year, to Julia dying before John could receive closure for his family. He had been there for the ups and downs of John's life but he had never seen him so distraught then when he had lost Cynthia and Julian. He loved him and wanted the best for him so that's why he refused to help John with his way of coping. He didn't want to hurt him or selfishly hurt himself. He always stook to his every promise.

Even though this would absolute murder him, Stu promised to keep this one too.

☆▪☆▪☆▪☆▪☆▪☆▪☆▪☆▪☆▪☆▪

Paul let out a sigh of content as he ran his fingers through his newly washed hair. He had gotten home about ten minutes ago and had thrown himself into the shower as soon as possible, wanting to feel fresh before taking Martha on a nice and slow walk. He went into the kitchen cabinet and reached up to grab his medication before a wave of dizziness and nausea hit him. He placed both of his hands on the counter below him, supporting himself until he saw less of the white spots around him. He was about to reach over and grab hus meds when his home phone rang as he diligently cursed before answering with a happy

"Hello? Oh yes! This is he.. Yes I do sing at the children's library from time to time.. yes yes I'm not available for a while though but I know a lad who sings for school Visits-he's not as good of me of course but I can give you...His number...? Hello??" He sighed as the other line beeped signaling that the person didn't buy Paul's bullshit and had hung up.

_'Great. Bloody fucking shit. There goes another client. With money. To pay my bills. There goes another chance of living..'_\- . His thoughts were interrupted by Martha's happy yelping and what seemed to be another voice. After eliminating the chances of being Ritchie (he only stuck to visiting on Wednesdays today was Thursday) he tensed up and imagined the worse.

Instead of doing the reasonable thing and calling the police he grabbed the nearest items in sight, which was his umbrella, and walked outside to his porch, fear and nervousness driving his body forward on instinct. He called out for Martha with a cautious and weary voice before snapping his head in shock after hearing an unexpected cheeful voice answer.

"We're out here come join us after youre done putting yer makeup on Paulie" paul dropped his umbrella as he slipped his slippers on and casually walked outside, the voice bringing a sense of familiarity and calmness.

He was shocked to find John in suit and all, kneeling down on the harsh gravel. He was petting martha and making little soothing noises until eventually she snapped her head over to look at Paul. He gave a suspious small smile before calling her over with a pat on his legs and a whistle. John quickly stood up and wiped off the dirt off his pants.

" Hello Mr. Mccartney nice to see you're still breathing" he said as if it was the most casual thing to just show up to a persons house unannounced and play with their dog.

"What the bloody hell are you doing here?" he questioned as he put marthas paws onto the floor. She had almost tumbled him to the ground once she had noticed he had came. The said dog walked over to John, sniffing him before deciding that he would be his new dad to cuddle with. She went back to eating something out of a brown bag like paper before John cooed down at her and petted her before continuing the conversation.

"Oh well son I came to see you!" he momentarily before paying his full attetion to Martha who began wagging her tail in happiness. What a _betrayer_.

"Don't you tax people ever call?" He qyestioned as he made his way over to martha. John said something about how 'you people then tend try to hide things' before he noticed that martha was eating meat-. MEAT????

Paul was almsot sweept off his feet when he saw how John had interacted with martha (ignoring the fucking weird part where he just showed up on his patio) but it was all ruined once he saw him feed her meat. Not only was it because he was vegetarian himself but also meat always made her _extremely_ hyper.

"Is that meat?? NO NO NO MARTHA... Martha no open o-open.." he sruggled as he attempted to open martha's mouth as if she were to understand her wrongings; She only smiled before licking her owners fingers.

" Whats wrong with the ole chicken leg? Mans got to get his protein somehow.." John said as he ruffled marthas head before picking up his briefcase and standing awkwardly. His plan was heading in the right direction so far.

"CHICKENLEG-? chicken leg?? she eats steamed broccoli and boiled eggs- she is a vegatrian.. oh shiet..." he whispered as he saw martha begin to run around in circles, the meat already affecting her in the most annoying of ways.

"She?? She- that gigantic sweeatheart of a sheepdog is a vegatrian?? christ son poor lassie." John said as he winced once martha had ran passed him and almost knocked him over in the process. He finally managed to catch his balance before scratching the back of his neck and clearing his thorat and asking

"Well now that thats over can we have a talk? Chitty chat the day away? Do you have the time? Mr. McCarntey?" Paul was simply shocked at the aducity that was John Lennon.

Firstly he breaks into his house and feeds his dog meat barely one day after he was dicharged just to talk about his tax issues. He would almost feel touched if it wasnt the topic of coversation.

"Well actaully Mr.Lennon when people don't call ahead the other people tend to either not want be seen or have plans and I unfortunately have the latter, needing to walk my dog so if you'll excuse me-" he was interrupted by a panicked John walked over and carefully took out the leesh from Pauls hand.

"Not a problem ill- uh ill go with you! I need the exercise meself.. that is if you don't mind Mr. McCartney?" he asked as he already put on marthas leesh and patted her.

Martha lookd up at Paul with the biggest puppy eyes he had ever seen in his life and for once he had finally felt what other people did when he pulled that dirty trick out of his sleeve. Paul let out a heavy sigh before grabbing the leesh from Johns hand and leading the way....

♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆

Martha does not eat meat for a _solid_ very _honest_ and _good_ reason. Paul had came to that conclusion when he first got her, and John had finally came to that conclusion as he attempted, key word, attempted to run through all of Pauls debts proven, to be difficult due to that fact that martha was trying to haul ass and bring Paul along with her.

Paul after many rejected offers from John had finally given in and let him attempt key word attempt, to not just handle martha but also try to go on with his little presenation. "Ive been going over the past five years annndd-OHH SHIET Fuck.." he said as he was dragged along by martha. Paul chuckled as he saw the scene unravel.

He let out another giggle as John was launched foward dropping his folder in the process. He muttered about meat not being a good idea before Paul finally took pitty upon the male and offered to contiue this in his home.

Once they were finally in (with the expection of martha was running all over Pauls backyard) Paul had put a bangers and mash meal into the oven to reward John for all his couragous running and helping out. They made small coversation about cooking as Paul was arranging the food and John got his papers in order.

"Oh I've seen your tricks and games laddie, cooking your food ahead of time like a productive little mummys boy" john teased as he briefly looked up at paul from his paper before contuining his work. Paul let out a smile and a small puff of air before answering with a witty

" No actually you see me dog actually cooks them for me as I sit back and relax" he opened the oven and put the timer on for twenty minutes before throwing a cheeky smile at Johns sacastic glare and truthfully answering

" actually I can't remember the last time I cooked, my nurse Rita comes and cooks for me, meal preps if you fancy, to help me with time magement. WIshed it was me parents but they've been gone for a while.. Do -- do you have any family Mr. Lennon?" he asked and wiped his hands before sighing and taking a seat. He ran his had through his slightly sweaty hair and motioned with his hand for John to answer.

"No--No, No siblings that I'm aware of, I've got me da but hes.. hes a good lad..." he drifted off into his real thoughts about his father before clearing his throat and ending the quickly turned akaward conversation.

"Hmmm uh um have you been receiving any income from any source other than her majesty, with out her knowing of course." he questioned as he stared at the other male who began to fidget in his seat and play around with his hair.

Johns eyes zoomed to the latters face as he spotted slightly brown tiny freckles and what seemed to be a slight flush under neath the males long, long doll like lashes. His nose was slightly scrunched up as he began to answer in which John panicked and snapped his eyes to look down at his paper.

" well as long as you don't tell but lately I've been taking to diving in local wishwells so but I mean its just the occasional dimes here and there- oh or once and a while a quarter thats really" he made a click with his tounge as he answered wittly with an American accent. John let out a small smile as his eyes followed the kettle to the stove where it had gone off.

As he poured John a generous amount of tea and follwoing himself afterwards he sat and answered seriously not wanting to lose the handsom- his tax mans patience.

"No actually I had to refiance his place to pay my past medical bills y' know typical poverty stuff to wallow in." he slightly joked as he took a sip to his tea and looked at John for a reaction. He was slighlty disappointed once he saw his blank face what seemd to be lost in thought. He quickly shook his head and cleared his throat beofere continuing.

"I've been informed that you suffer from congential heart failure" he looked up and met Paul's eyes with an unreadable emotion before he started awatin again with his response. Paul shifted uncomfortably before fixing his posture and answering, rembering how he felt whe he first felt Johns eyes on him at the hospital.

"Ah yes and just out curoisty, was that before or after you counted the hair on my head?" he said impying the slight stalking that was done before hand. John flushed at the metion that he was caught before quickly continuing "NO--No no.. I.. You're uh currently statues two which means you're sick enough to be on the national UNOS waiting list but not sick enough to be admitted to the hospital and be placed on status one." he finshed as Paul listened with less euthaism.

Some how hearing it from yet another person only made it seem worse as the words sank in deeper into his skull up to the point where it penetrates his brain and he has a migrane. The thought of him dying but not dying soon enough but soon enough to die with out help made him feel.. not so special.. John had no mercy as he contiued with Pauls depressing medical condtions.

"So basicaly with out any sugar just black coffe, if your heart starts to fail quickly and no one coughs up their heart, you're _royally fucked_." he almost seemingly spat out as he leaned back and watched

Pauls face fall further into a frown which seemed impossible but proven to be as the male furrowed his eyebrows. He let out a small and almost seeming vularable 'hmm-hmm" before john quickly interrupted with the final blow.

"Is it true son, that you said don't even believe that you deserve a heart because your life is slow, useless, absolutely in no way exciting and un remarkable in every way?" he preteded to look through some paper before glancing up at paul and getting his breath stuck in the adams apple.

Pauls face had looked like some just punched him in the cock spat on his face and called him pathetic for not being able to contoll what happened. In a way John sort of did. Paul tried to speak but seemigy couldn't find the words only a small gasp coming out instead. After sensing the mood and seeing that he didn't quite get the reaction he wanted he apololgized not wanting paul to feel even worse then he already did.

"I'm--I'm sorry..um.. I-I dont know why i said that..I-I'm so sorry." there was multiple pausing in between johns speaking as he struggled to voice his apoplgy. He was swiftly interrupted by a still in shock Paul who began to shake his head in disbelief.

"Do Ahem.. do you have to take some sort of sensitvity training to join the tax pople Mr. lennon?" he questoned as he rubbed his face in a depressing manner. He ruffled his hair before turning to john for an answer.

"no not really.."

" oh yeah.. what i thought y'know"

silence.

silence so thick that they'd be drowing if it wasn't for marthas distant yelping in the background that helped keep themelsves grounded. Paul fidgeted with his clothes and was about to suggest that they end this interaction early when john leaned in and contuined his little rant.

"so you dont consider yourself a good person?" he asked and as soon the heavy questoned was layed on the table paul sighed as he answered with a tired

"How would you feel if i asked you the same question Mr. lennon?" he asked expecting a witty comment or a defesince one anything but what he answered with. Instead he got a vularable like

" Unremarkable would be an upgrade for me...I assure you.." he let out a dry chuckle before staring intensely at Paul. Paul could only look back with what seemed like confusion and slight fear but also was completely drawn to the man who sat across him who claimed to be less than Unremarkable.

They stayed silent for what semmed like hours but in realilty were for a few seconds before John stood up and began to collect his things. He cleared his throat before finally adressing Paul with a nice tone from before.

" I am going to freeze your accounts as uncollectiveable until further notice..Im sure that It'll buy you about five to six mouths to get yer shit together laddie pentality free, the John Lennon special." he began to walk to the front door once he was done packing his belgonings before being stopped by a confused Paul holding his wrist. Before Paul let out the first syllable of his sentence John had given him his card and said

"If any other taxman tries to contact you, you call immediately" Paul had barely muttered an okay and a thank you before john let out a beautiful smile and walked closer to the door. He was once again stopped by a Pauls franctic shouting.

"I just... why do I get the feeling you're doing me one of the greatest favors of my life?" he questioned not caring how lost he sounded. John simply responded with a 

"Because I get the feeling your really deserve it" before opening the front door, giving paul one last breath taking smile and leaving through it. "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you smell that? Smells like Mclennon brewing.. or maybe McHarrison??? Who knows??? Just kidding I know. Or do I???????

**Author's Note:**

> Hello I hoped you enjoyed this chapter. I'm new at this so please don't put my head on a stick :))


End file.
